Kung Pow Chicken

toomanypuppets asked: If you could do nothing to alter it, would you want to know the day of your death?

Depends on how much information I am given. I have already accepted the “how” of my time to die. I know, for a fact, that I’m going to go on the toilet while reading a magazine, probably one that will make me look really bad when someone finds me. I’m sure the cover will have some topless dude on it and it’s going to seem like I was lost in a heart attack causing clutch of the heart while gazing at him. 

Knowing how much this is going to suck already, I think I would like to be informed so I can at least make sure I have a playboy in my hand the entire day. 

But that brings on an important, possible disastrous scenario. If I can change a minor detail like what I’m reading when I go wouldn’t logic indicate that I could change the rest of the outcome? Would the universe shear in half over my choice to grab a Playboy instead of an Esquire or would I simply move on, with death hunting me like Final Destination? 

Seems like a reasonably silly reason to destroy 6 billion years worth of work over me and some topless dude, but on the filp side, if I know for a fact I’m going to die on October 16th, 2034 I’m sure as hell not going to pick up a magazine with any kind of dude in it at all. 

I think I’m going to answer this question the way I should have, the way Dali would have if you asked him. Surrealists have a succinct way of thinking and I like to put myself in the category.  If I could go back in time and NOT type all of this my answer would be simple: 

Giraffe.